A week from today I will be flying down to Clearwater Florida to participate in my very first Triathlon. I have no big hopes of winning the race or even placing first in my age group, really my one and only wish is that I will be able to finish. I have started to freak out, you know that feeling where your heart is in your throat... where you have to remind yourself to calm down. I've started to feel that way, one moment I'm confident that I will be able to finish the race the next I drop into despair thinking I'm not prepared enough. I am really thankful that I won't be alone the day of the race one of my good friends is driving in from Miami so I won't be alone at the end of the race.

All I can say is that I will do my best. I can't give up on myself.

Time to go for a run!

Week 1 schedule:

Sunday- swim 10-15 minutes
Monday- bike 50 minutes, run 30 minutes, light weight training
Tuesday- run (Gazelle's workout), light weight training
Wednesday- easy 30 minute run, swim 20 minutes
Thursday- run (Gazelle's workout), bike 40 minutes
Friday- this might be a rest day, as I'm sure I'll be exhausted from the week
Saturday- bike 15-20 miles, run 3 miles


Week 2 schedule:

Sunday- swim 20-25 minutes
Monday- bike 60 minutes, run 30 minutes, light weight training
Tuesday- run (Gazelle's workout), light weight training
Wednesday- bike 60 minutes, easy run 30 minutes, swim 20 minutes
Thursday- run (Gazelle's workout), light weight training
Friday- bike 40 minutes
Saturday- easy 3-4 mile run
Sunday- REST
Monday- TRIATHLON

Getting out of my funk

I've been in a funk... I will admit it. I have not been exercising as much as I should. I could come up with all types of excuses but I won't do that. I will just say that I have two weeks until my very first Triathlon and I want to be able to complete it as best as I can.

Someday I will go into all the details of me struggling with self-confidence with my job as a dean, working with new people, my body, my weight, my school work, I could go on but I guess the best thing for me to do is to stop wallowing in self-pity and do something with my life besides watching TV and eating Nutella (I'm not even joking over the last few months I have had a serious love affair with Nutella) Oh my God look how far I have fallen.

Anyway... Here's to starting over...again and again... and again.

Can I really do this????

I was looking at the calender. My TRI is in five weeks! I am not where I thought I would be with my training. I am starting to freak, will I be able to do this? Was I stupid to even think I could accomplish this? All these negative thoughts are going through my head. What was wrong with me when I decided to pick a TRI all the way in Florida???? I'm scared of the swimming, I'm afraid that I'm not going to be able to make it to the end, its going to be different in open water. Why did I think I could do this!!! I'm going to look so stupid if I can't finish. I hope I feel better about this tomorrow.

6 Weeks Left

I'm back! Its been awhile since I've posted. The reason for this is the fact that I have fallen off the straight and narrow. I did not go to the gym these last few weeks and I might have ran three times. We have been really busy here on campus and for about a week I was the only Dean on duty, or having to travel because of some event, as a result my fitness took the back burner... There is no longer room for excuses. Its crunch time and I need to be absolutely focused. Today I spent some quality time at Starbucks typing out a detailed workout plan for myself, I went to the gym did pilates, ran, and the most exciting thing about this day was I finally bought a bike! Whenever it gets here I will post a in depth review of my awesome new bike.  It is a Vilano Aluminum Road Bike 21 Speed Shimano after weeks of searching and debating I decided that I didn't want to spend anything over $500 for a bike. I am an absolute beginner when it comes to cycling and I didn't want to spend a ton of money on a bike. I almost bought a Walmart bike... than I searched a little more, reads some articles, read reviews on amazon and finally settled on this one. The best part is the bike I bought had a suggested retail value of $500 it had been marked down twice and I ended up paying only $199 plus shipping. What a blessing! I know that I still have to wait and see what I got in the mail but I'm confident that it will be fine. If not amazon has a good return policy.  In the next coming days I will go into detail about the schedule I have for myself until than here is the table that I have for week one of my 6 week training schedule. Hopefully all will go well and I will be ready November 10! Week 1 Training plan
Monday	Tuesday	Wednesday	Thursday	Friday	Sabbath	Sunday
-Run 2 miles (3min run, 1 minute walk) -Bike 7 miles Strengh a	Swim (8) Pilates Strength b	Run 2 miles Bike 7 miles Strength a	Swim (4) Bike 7 miles Strength b	Swim (2) Run 2 miles Strength a	REST!	Run 3 miles Bike 10 miles If possible focused free swim

  

Week 6 day 2

I've been going off track a little bit with my running training, however I think its good for me to take it a little bit slower than my couch to 5k program is directing me, because I noticed if I do the same two weeks in a row I tend to be stronger when its time to move up a level. Also I feel like since I'm doing running, biking, and swimming I have to limit myself so I won't get injured. 

I like to workout at the civic center during the middle of the day there are less people there. Today I got there around 3:30 and when I went to do some weight training these huge guys were coming in and out and making those super annoy grunting sounds as they lifted there 60-70 pound weights. I felt really awkward with my little 8lb dumbbells. 

I didn't go swimming today... I wanted to but I just didn't have time... well I went to Pilates instead. I

find that doing Pilates really helps me with my flexibility and I hate leaving it out of my workout schedule. I could go tomorrow morning before work but I know tomorrow is going to be extremely long and busy. Maybe I can practice for a couple of hours on Thursday. :) 

Today I ran. I ran further than I ever have. The most amazing thing is the fact that I'm pretty sure I could have ran longer. I'm doing this! I'm running, I'm biking, I'm learning how to swim. I'm so thankful for the people in my life who have encouraged me and helped me believe in myself. Thank you.

Oh my word tomorrow I'm going to wake up early and go do Yoga,the class starts at 7am that may not sound to early to many but its been so long since I've actually woken up that early.

Right now my goal is to keep going 

Yesterday was my day off so I put in some quality hours at the gym. I started off with a swimming lesson and then after my lesson I practiced for a good 45 minutes. It was super hot outside so I decided that I would use the indoor track. I learned that my gps does not track well in indoor places so I'm not quite sure how far I went. I finally ended my workout with a 5.6 mile bike ride while listening to the I have a dream speech in honor of the march on Washington 50th anniversary.

Yesterday was a good day, I won't go into details but I went to an amazing concert and it was beautiful. As I drove home from Nashville I had sometime to think on what I saw and heard I'm still processing the amazing music I heard.

Feeling completely blissful.

I told someone I was training for my first Triathlon and they asked "for next year?" When I told them I was doing it in November I could tell they didn't think I would be able to do it. It kind of made me angry but at the same time I guess I can understand, I don't exactly look like an athlete. 

I'm not going to deny that I've had my doubts about being able to complete this triathlon but today I was thinking about the incredible feeling I will have when I complete it, even if I'm the last person to cross the finish line I will be able to say I'm a triathlete. I have a burning desire to know what that feels like. So no matter how slow my progress is I will press on. 

Plan for tomorrows workout

1. 8:15 yoga at the Civic Center

2.Run 35 minutes (week 5 day 1 I have never made it this far before)

3. Bike 6 miles on stationary bike

4.Practice in the pool 45 minutes

As I type this it seems like a lot but this week I will only be able to go to the gym on Tuesday and Wednesday so I have to fit it all in on one day. I will succeed!

Week 4 Day 3

Today's inner monologue:
"I have until Sunday to finish my four runs for the week why don't I just take a break today?"
"Oh but look at what you had for lunch and supper today!"
'You had way to much. That weight you've been losing is going to come right back, if you start being a lazy slob again Kendra."
 "I'm not a lazy slob! I just don't feel like going today"
"Man the f***k (freak) up and GO!"
Today so many feelings of self doubt and loathing were swirling through my mind. Why do I let people dictate how I feel! Well I channeled those feelings of frustration, self loathing, doubt,  and anger into my run today. I can't say those feelings are gone but I have a sort of self satisfaction that will get me through the rest of the night.

Cheesy Motivational Quote of the Day

Week 4 day 2

Today was rough. I was feeling tired and achy today and I definitely did not want to go running. I did go running today, and as I went my self confidence begin to plummet. All these doubts began to creep in, "Why did you sign up for that triathlon kendra? You can't even run a straight mile yet, its literally been years since you've entered the water, August is almost over you don't have a bike!" As I type these words down I'm becoming scared. Is it actually possible for me to teach myself how to swim? I've spent almost $200 dollars so far towards this goal of mine. I cannot give up just yet. I need to dig a little deeper and work a lot hard  so that my dream of completing this Tri is realized.

I need to figure out a plan to boost my morale.

The worst possible thing that could happen is if I quit, I can't quit.

I need to learn how to swim.

I need to believe in myself.

I did enjoy this song today as I ran

Week 4 Day 1

I've started a new Blog! There are a few reasons for this, lately I have found that I am starting to blog more than I used to. I don't know how long this will last but until I become too busy to blog all the time or I get bored with it, I thought it would fun to blog about my adventures as a novice runner.

Today I began week 4 day 1 of my couch to 5k program. I  ran longer than I ever have in my whole entire life. That I know of. Its exhilarating to know that its all me thats doing this no one is helping me. I am entirely self motivated, it was me who told myself when I looked at my cell and it said that I had 2:34 left on the clock, it was me who ran on despite the voice in my head that said I wouldn't be able to do it.

When I say this I sound boastful and proud. I don't mean for it to come out that way but for years I've been so down on myself when it comes to exercise, academics, life in generally. I always felt second to others, who ever first said we are own worst critic was so right.

As a side note I'm going to try to be more real on this blog. I don't think I care who reads this but I'm not going to advertise that I started a new running blog what if I quit...
So back to running and self confidence I guess what I'm trying to verbalize is that it has helped me to accept my self and build confidence in myself. Even though each run isn't going to be perfect the fact that I'm willing to go back and try again the next day is a step in the right direction.

How do I know that I am a runner? Today I didn't have to force myself to go out and do it, I wanted to run. :)